(from living fairly isolated around the world over the past 10 years, and living through a pandemic shutdown…)

1. Form a simple, natural routine.It must be simple enough so that you will do it at least 5/7 days a week.  That you can easily come back to it if you get “off”.Should feel natural to you so that you can experience the feelings of familiarity, ease and home in the routine itself.  These naturally give the mind a way to relax against the stresses that isolation can cause. 
2. Have artifacts of connection.We all have different ways of connecting to artifacts–those objects or things that have meaning for us.  Like Tom Hanks’ character had with the soccer ball he drew a face on and named Wilson in order to have someone to talk to, or how I carry 3 specific books with me, my journal and my favorite mug when I travel for long periods…Recognizing and reaching out to touch those few things that most feel like connection to us are powerful daily touch-points for us psychologically and emotionally.  These can be anything–
   1. running our camera roll pictures as the changing screensaver on our computer that bring us to reexperience moments in our lives
   2. An altar, meditation cushion, symbolic relic, or place for spiritual practice or concentration.
   3. A special knick knack, a rock/crystal, a specific glass for your wine each evening, or a meaningful gift from someone.
   4. A book or quote. Or a special bookmark in the book you’re currently reading.
   5. Special incense or scent that you love and lifts you up when you smell it.
3. Get natural light every day, as much of it as you can.  Out-of-doors is preferable!You know as well as I how much your brain depends on natural light for your circadian rhythms and subsequent hormone balance.  We feel better just getting natural light into our eyes.
4. Nature, nature, nature.It seems so simplistic, and yet, when we are isolated and out in nature, certain sixth and seventh senses begin to emerge naturally in us.  We are a part of life on the planet, alive and breathing.  We connect to this when we spend time in nature.If we are able to be ‘deep’ in nature such as on a hike, in a forest or desert, out on water, or far from neighborhoods or cities, we can begin to get the sense of geologic time–long ages in the rocks beneath our feet or the oldest trees around us or the ocean meeting the beach of a continental plate over hundreds of thousands of years. Feeling the ages of life around us is strangely calming and relieving–the sense of continuity that we are a part of. 
5. Have regular face-time and conversation with people you care about.If you haven’t previously cultivated such relationships, start a small circle of people who are also looking for this type of connection and support who will meet up regularly over video as well as phone.  Being able to ‘see’ someone even over video is highly impactful to the brain and our socialization.Conversely, if you are someone who has to show up professionally to facetime all of the time, you may find, like me, you relish the quiet that isolation can bring.  If this is the case, be sure to intentionally plan connection time at least once a week with people you care about.  This helps avoid the risk of depression that can happen unconsciously when we don’t get that connection-interaction we need.

1. Closely monitor addictive behaviors and have a plan for having new experiences to counter the disconnection that underlies our addictive behaviors.  Addictive behaviors can be:- sleeping too much
   – staying up too late every night
   – binge-watching movies or series
   – overindulging sugar, alcohol, carbs, weed, other substances
   – being critical towards those close to you (this can sneak up on us)
   – becoming too rigid with our routine–we can take it too far
   – etc.When you have a plan for new experiences, your brain looks forward to the future in anticipation which is highly effective to help against the disconnection isolation can cause.  In addition, new experiences automatically spark our creativity giving us inspiration to use our creative abilities in novel and diverse ways.  This can bring us to flow-state which is an excellent counter to the effects of isolation–a true deep connectedness. 
2. Take up a new passion or interest.I don’t tend to use the word hobby because it feels too discardable for the time and personal investment we make.  I prefer to go for finding a new passion–a musical instrument (or a difficult piece of music), learning a new cuisine by making different dishes and inviting people over to eat them, learning to dance hip/hop or the samba, learning the birds in your area, a writing group, or… wait for it… Karaoke!!
3. Laugh.  Find ways to laugh.  Laughing is a radio channel you tune into.  When you tune into laughter, you unconsciously seek it out, seeing or hearing the humor in situations all around you.  The more you tune into laughter, the more there will be to cause for laughter.  It really is the best medicine!
4. Look for ways to help.  There’s probably nothing more powerful in our human drama than seeing others who may need help, and showing up to help them.  This form of human connection brings us to the very center of our existence.  To reaffirm that we are not alone, and at the same time to remember that while we are important, it’s not all about us.
5. Do work of the self.  Get to know yourself in new and different ways from what you’ve always assumed or expected about yourself.  The work of the self is how we can feel connection even when we are alone or isolated.  As I say to people, I am never alone even when I’m alone.  This is because I am with myself and I have a deep and vibrant relationship with this phenomenal soul within me.

The ability to thrive when we are isolated hinges entirely on our paying close attention and listening to ourselves.  It also depends entirely on the actions we take.  In my Core Self Discovery work, I not only guide you in the deeper work of the self, I also bring you more fully into thriving in any environment–including isolation.

You can learn more about Core Self Discovery here.  Remember, your own company can turn out to be the first most fulfilling relationship of your life!

xo, C