{"id":7458,"date":"2021-04-29T14:02:23","date_gmt":"2021-04-29T14:02:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/carmellclark.com\/new\/?page_id=7458"},"modified":"2021-04-29T14:02:45","modified_gmt":"2021-04-29T14:02:45","slug":"1999-my-brave-new-world-at-30","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/carmellclark.com\/new\/1999-my-brave-new-world-at-30\/","title":{"rendered":"1999: My Brave New World at 30"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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1999: My Brave New World at 30<\/h2>\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t
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I half-woke on a November morning in 1999. \u00a0The utterly clear thought went through my body, \u201cI\u2019M NOT HAPPY.\u201d \u00a0I knew instantly that it was true on the deepest level of my being. \u00a0I immediately responded, \u201cWhy?\u201d \u00a0The answer came just as quick, just as clear, \u201cI CAN NEVER BE GOOD ENOUGH FOR GOD.\u201d \u00a0True. \u00a0It was true! \u00a0What?! \u00a0<\/p>

There was no hiding. \u00a0I quickly came to realize I had to make a choice that very day. \u00a0I was either going to choose to accept myself exactly as I was from here on out\u2013which I knew was not good enough for God (as I believed then)\u2013or I was going to choose God and live the rest of my life never being enough and never accepting who I was. \u00a0Me\u2026or Him?<\/p>

But I knew. \u00a0By the end of that day, something deep inside me chose me. \u00a0My entire world changed that day. \u00a0I left the paradigm I\u2019d grown up with, the beliefs that tied me to my family and my community, and most of all, I walked away from what I believed God was. \u00a0<\/p>

The beautiful irony is that I\u2019d instinctually ended the spiritual emotional blackmail I\u2019d grown up with. \u00a0As I loved and accepted myself as I was, I came to know my true connection to the divine. \u00a0I chose me, and it turns out that was also\u00a0choosing god<\/i>.<\/p>

The truth sets us free. \u00a0What did I really know? \u00a0It was simple: \u00a0<\/i>Practicing\u00a0unconditioned<\/b>\u00a0love, having no guilt, and making no judgment. \u00a0That\u2019s it. \u00a0Consciousness began breaking open in me and I began to lead myself from that inner intuition and connection to a deeper truth we all know and feel.<\/p>

Years later, one client in speaking to his own dilemma on participating in his faith, said, \u201cYou\u2019re so good! You do all the same things we\u2019re taught to do, but you do them because you want to\u2014because they\u2019re naturally a part of you\u2014not because you\u2019re trying to be good enough.\u201d<\/p>

Yes. \u00a0That\u2019s the point \ud83d\ude09<\/p>

Back to timeline<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

1999: My Brave New World at 30 I half-woke on a November morning in 1999. \u00a0The utterly clear thought went through my body, \u201cI\u2019M NOT HAPPY.\u201d \u00a0I knew instantly that it was true on the deepest level of my being. \u00a0I immediately responded, \u201cWhy?\u201d \u00a0The answer came just as quick, just as clear, \u201cI CAN […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"elementor_header_footer","meta":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n1999: My Brave New World at 30 - Carmell Clark<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"http:\/\/carmellclark.com\/1999-my-brave-new-world-at-30\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"1999: My Brave New World at 30 - Carmell Clark\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"1999: My Brave New World at 30 I half-woke on a November morning in 1999. \u00a0The utterly clear thought went through my body, \u201cI\u2019M NOT HAPPY.\u201d \u00a0I knew instantly that it was true on the deepest level of my being. \u00a0I immediately responded, \u201cWhy?\u201d \u00a0The answer came just as quick, just as clear, \u201cI CAN […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"http:\/\/carmellclark.com\/1999-my-brave-new-world-at-30\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Carmell Clark\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2021-04-29T14:02:45+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"2 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"http:\/\/carmellclark.com\/#website\",\"url\":\"http:\/\/carmellclark.com\/\",\"name\":\"Carmell Clark\",\"description\":\"Author . 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